Hello Cat Toothpaste, Goodbye Fingers

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Presenting the world’s most tolerant cat! From Canada – where else?

If you watched that video, you’re ready to hear all about our cat and his oral hygiene. Fasten your seat belts…

Here he is. Two years old, and already

BLOG cat breath

simple chronic halitosis đŸ˜¦

So, daring lady I am, I took a look at his chompers: swollen gums and yaller teeth! Oh, the felinity! I was guessing that explained the barfed-up whole kibble, and his rubbing his drooly gums on my glasses every time I sat down. (Cat ownership is Glamorous!)

Knowing a professional cleaning was just not in the cards (besides the cost, which is substantial, your cat is doped up and freaky deaky for a whole day afterwards. It’s a major procedure and he’s just a baby!) – I hit the old laptop for a DIY cat-dentistry solution.  Cat toothpaste.

BLOG well cat

“I’n goink to ki you in yoh sleeth”

Photo from The Well Cat Book by Dr. Terri McGinnis, © 1996

Just a pinch between the cheek and gum, and – wait a second, that’s Skoal.

I did an Amazon search for “cat toothpaste” and because it’s Amazon, and you can get any two words put together, I found it! But, I wanted it NOW. When you make up your mind to brush your cat’s teeth, you’ve got to go ahead and do it, or you will lose heart.

I didn’t even go down the rabbit hole of reading the reviews like I usually do. My kitteh had gum disease and I was going to attack it. I went to my trusted local pet supply store.

hairy king

It’s a really great store, I mean, it’s fantastic. I get all my products there for my very manly mane.

It was as I feared: too much selection! They had “human looking” pastes, gels, brushes and sprays. They had kelp – probably a great idea, but I’m not sure it’s really up my cat’s alley… finally, one of the women who worked there showed me this:

BLOG cat cheese

Hint: it’s cheese

Yes, there’s very little in Wisconsin that can’t be solved with cheese. Of course! Cheese…

In large quantities, cheese isn’t healthy for cats. Or anyone. But, this is a fine powder you just put on your finger and rub on your cat’s gums (which are surprisingly foldy and extensive), and your cat does most of the work by salivating and licking it off with it’s rough tongue – built-in toothbrush!! How’s that for natural remedy?

You may be wondering how that is supposed to get the plaque and tartar off your cat’s teeth. Ideally, the enzymes in the cheese break that stuff down and it falls gracefully away like blossoms from a cherry tree.

But even if it doesn’t, who cares?, says your cat because everyone knows cheese is a natural opioid. (Here’s an article from US Weekly, where I get all of my scientific information. It concludes that everything that’s tasty is as addictive as crack. You know, Science!!)

And here in Wisconsin, we have a lot of pain to kill, which has absolutely nothing to do with the amount of dairy we eat. So welcome to the club, cats! You may lose your teeth, but don’t worry, you’ll be as numb as the rest of us.

Also, don’t be surprised if you see us sprinkling your dental supplement on our popcorn.

…Like great blogs? Here’s one you’ll love by my friend, J.W. Martin. You’ll find me there, too!

BLOG fotr

Zombies a’plenty

 

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3 thoughts on “Hello Cat Toothpaste, Goodbye Fingers

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